Careful Communication

I have mentioned several times that good communication is vital to a healthy relationship. It is crazy to think that we treat those we love the most with the most bitterness, sarcasm, anger, and malice. Most of us wouldn't dare treat a stranger or acquaintance like that, so why do we treat our loved ones worse? There's no doubt that we love them, so we should show that love a whole lot more often! A healthy relationship needs a great dose of love and our communication needs a great dose of love too!

Typically the first thing that comes to mind when someone mentions the word communication, people think about verbal communication. There are other ways including our tone and nonverbal (body language) communication. Some may be surprised to know that people pay more attention to nonverbal communication more than they give attention to words. We should be aware of how we present our message. Are you sassy or sarcastic? Do you fold your arms when you talk? Are you calm or excitable? How do you use your hands? What about your facial expressions? (I get in trouble with that one a lot!)

It's safe to say that we use communication all day, everyday. Now I want to talk about how we communicate with our spouses and families when we're making big decisions. This method of counseling is used by leaders of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and many couples/families around the world.

1. Express love and appreciate to all that are involved
2. Open up the council meeting with a prayer
3. Discuss the matter in an attitude of humility until you come to a consensus
4. End the meeting with a prayer
5. Again express your love and gratitude with others

Can you imagine how nicely making family decisions would go if everyone followed this pattern? It's important to remember that this model isn't magic, each member of the family will need to have a cooperative and humble approach to the situation. This is a time for calm discussion of everyone's point of view, not just the main leaders of the family. You would be surprised how many good ideas come from those who usually remain quiet. They just need to be given the opportunity and a safe environment to share. There will be more peace in the home if families followed this pattern, and making decisions will be easier and more pleasant.